Posted by
Flatlanders on Wednesday, October 22, 2008 10:05:06 PM
The Bill of Lefts include, but are not limited, to these certain unalienable principles :
| 1.
Thou shall be secure in the faith that government will take care of
you. Everything is free as long as you don't work for it. So you are
best off not working at all or as little as possible. |
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| 2. Government shall never take away anything it gives you. However, it may take away anything you earn on your own. |
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| 3.
There shall be plenty of mandates on the other guy. You are safe as
long as you choose do as little as possible -- then government will not
ask you to do anything in return. Whatever you do, don't ever think
about employing someone. |
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| 4. Bubbas who hang out together can get most anything they want as long as they promise to vote for left wing Democrats. |
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| 5. Government can always raise taxes on the rich because success is just not fair no matter what the tax rate. |
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| 6.
Deficits are a part of life, but that is only a problem for those with
money. If the government gives you a credit card for health care or
anything, use it as much as you want. The more you use it, the more
free things you can expect to get with it in the future. |
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| 8.
The PRESSident only report the views that the PRESSident feels are
useful propaganda for their intended audience. Conflicting reports are
fine as long as the conclusion by promises new programs. |
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| 9.
Most laws are best written by judges and regulatory agencies, so it is
best to make any legislation as vague and contradictory as possible. |
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| 10. All rights reserved to the States and individuals are subject to the previous rule. |
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| 11.
When your position can't be substantiated by logic or facts, divert the
issue to another topic that defames or attacks your opposition's
credibility. It is good if there is little justification to do so, and
even better if your spin is full of falsehoods and logical gaps. If
you are guilty of something, defend yourself by saying your opponent is
guilty of the same crime, even if it there is no truth in the
accusation. |
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| 12.
Unquestioning faith in Big Government shall be a promoted and protected
right. The goal is for non-secular faith, its welfare programs and
worship of liberal politicians to eventually replace religion.
Conservatives who have little faith in big government secularism shall
be persecuted and scorned as radical right wing extremist unbelievers
of the worse kind. |
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| 13.
The goal of feel good government programs isn't to fix problems. The
primary intention of government programs is to create more opportunites
for new feel good programs to fix the problems other feel good programs
create. |
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| 14.
Political Bigotry is promoted so long as it expresses all sorts of
ridiculous bias against Conservatives. The more ridiculous the
political bigotry, the better. |
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